How to Become a Cash Whore

 People who love money above all else, and yes there are billions of them, are really the poorest creatures on Earth.

Look at the Repulican Party.  They come to Washington, tie on the feedbag and sell themselves to the highest corporate bidders.  They don't come to Washington to represent anyone.  They don't come to Washington to legislate.  They have gotten absolutely nothing done for decades, as a political party.  They are famished whores who can never stuff enough money down in their pockets. 

If you find yourself in the unfortunate circumstance of being a cash whore, there are simple solutions.  Give some of the money you're hoarding to people who actually need it.  Stop voting Republican, which is just like saying, stop shooting yourself in the foot (unless you're ultra wealthy).  

I find it so laughable to see how fat most members of the Republican Party have become.  They're obese due to all the expensive dinners lobbyists treat them to.  Imagine anyone wanting to sit across the table from Ted Cruz and actually eat something.  The sight of him alone would quell the most voracious appetite.  But lobbyists aren't there to eat.  Well, they are, but that's a whole other metaphor.

Let's demand fitness in Politics.  Anyone more than 50 lbs. over their ideal weight, based on BMI, must be expelled from Congress at once.  Obviously, they are piggies at the dinner table, and they're not paying for the food.  But they ARE taking food out of your mouths and making bigger piggies of anyone willing to pay them.  

Pig farming is a dirty business.  It should never be conducted within city limits.