Tuesday, January 14, 2014

Red White and Blue really Black, Blacker and Blackest

This country is so full of crap I can't stand living here.

There are a few things on which I can rely:

#1.  Any political statement sponsored by Americans for Prosperity is an outrageous lie.

#2.  Americans are too stupid to understand the hoax being perpetrated on them by #1.

#3.  Chris Christie is a pain in the a$$, fat cat whose penchant for power is only overshadowed by his penchant for (obviously) all the wrong foods.

#4.  Anything Bobby Jindal does Scott Walker will mimic.  Two half wits if there ever was a whole.

#5.  Scott Walker being paid a governor's salary is sadder, more ironic, and just plain unfair than his opinions on who earns a minimum wage.  Scott Walker would be overpaid at minimum wage.  Period.

#6.  The fact that a whole city was unable to drink or bathe in water because it's been contaminated by a business is reflective of how all of America is being sold out for a corporate bottom line.

#7.  The fact that a whole state's coastline has been destroyed by oil and gas exploration companies is a crime even more hideous than the crime of the local fisherman's ignorant opinion that to fix this would cause fishing problems.  Huh?  Fishing problems?  Louisiana is a classic example on how it benefits corporations to keep the populace uneducated by spoon feeding them fish tales.

#8.  I live in the south.  It's conservative.  I get that.  But I can't stand the news programs and how freaking biased all information broadcast here actually is.  Can someone please start up a television station that doesn't reek of stagnant cultural biases.

#9.  Justin Bieber does coke.  Jesus - we haven't had a decent new drug in decades.  Coke is so pass√©.  As unhappy as Americans are, you'd think someone would have come up with a fun drug that's actually good for you.  I mean, besides Viagra.

#10.  American's are as f*cking boring as their ridiculous opinions, hobbies and fetishes.  As a culture, we're so NOTHING.  Why would anyone covet anything here?  I'm just so over this super power, because it's SO NOT.  We're dull, depressed, dissatisfied, demented, delusional and drugged up.  Someone kill us.

Obviously, I'm having a particularly unpatriotic day today.  These moods descend on me on a regular basis.  Sure wish I didn't live in America.  It's killing me.


Souri said...

I'd marry you if you weren't already married. I wish everybody would think like you. Then this country would be tolerable and livable.

AlexisAR said...

Living in The South would be tough for me, too.