One of my favorite cousins is in town from New Mexico, so she, her sister and daughter and I all went out for Mexican food for lunch.
Aye ca rumba, I guess it was my idea to get the large pitcher of strawberry margaritas. It was a good idea. We had wonderful conversation, catching up, and remembering all the childhood moments that made us who we are.
I love my cousins; they fill the void in my life left by my estranged sisters. One cousin said, "resolve the issues"; but there aren't really any issues to resolve. Life is short, but not so short one has to tolerate truly unkind behavior or emotional abuse. In the name of peace, I just keep my distance. But I'm glad I have my cousins. I felt a little bit like I had to justify the estrangement, but then I realized, I didn't. It is what it is. No one is any the worse for wear with that particular lack of a sisterhood relationship. In fact, I've never been better. I hope I can stay that way. I'm sorry that my original family is not a family at all......but I also know it's not my fault nor is it a situation I can fix, or even want to fix. I've attained a comfortably numb peace with things the way they are.
I guess a lot of families end up like mine, estranged, distant, barely speaking anything but the most polite civilities. And its okay. I've found my family. I hope they've found theirs.
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2 comments:
It sounds like everyone is in his or her happy place, or, at the very least, you are. In the final analysis, that's all yu really have control over anyway.
That seems to be the reality! And I must say my life is so much more peaceful without the drama my sisters are famous for invoking.
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